Key Peele Substitute Teacher
Bell rings all right, listen up, y'all.I'm y'all's substitute teacher, mr.Garvey.I taught school for 20 years in the inner city, so don't even think about messing with me.Y'all feel me mmhmm.Okay.Let's take roll here.Jay quellin.Where's jay quellin at no jay quellin here clears throat yeah.Uh, do you mean jacqueline okay.So that's how it's gonna be.Y'all wanna play.Okay, then.I got my eye on you, jay quellin.Balakay.Where is balakay at there's no balakay here today.
Yes, sir.My name is blake.Bl.Are you out of your goddamn mind mocking voice blake.What do you wanna go to war, balakey no.'cause we could go to war.No.I'm for real.I'm for real.So you better check yourself.Deenice.Is there a deenice if one of y'all says some sillyass name.This whole class is gonna feel my wrath.Now, deenice.Do you mean denise son of a bitch! you say your name right, right now.Denise you say it right.
denise.Correctly.Denise.Right.Denise.Right.Deenice.That's better.Sighs thank you.Now, ayayron.Where are you where is ayayron right now no ayay ron, huh well, you better be sick, dead, or mute, ayayron! here.Oh, man.Why didn't you answer me the first time i said it, huh huh you know, i'm just asking you.I said it, like, four times.So why didn't you say it the first time i said, ayayron because it's pronounced aaron..
College Football Coaches Escalating Salaries
So when i played in the sixties i had no idea how much money ara parsgian made now retrospectively because i know what the football coach at oregon state made in the early seventies around twenty five thousand dollars i'm guessing that ara made you know forty thousand dollars or something it's just a guess we didn't know and it didn't matter to us it wasn't a factor that was part of our lives today and of course we have some coaches making over five million dollars and the average coach in the whole.
Football bowl subdivision is over one million and the bcs schools you know two million has become entry level for a coach so how did that happen you know you know entry level well entry level at the highest level you pay your dues before you get there but okay so competition from the nfl has to be one factor 'cause some of these coaches move back and forth um although what it takes to be successful in the nfl and in college are completely different things very few jimmy johnson that's about it guys don't make that transition.
Very very smoothly either direction for the most part but but it's not just these market forces out there over which universities have no control it's the decisions that individual institutions make and so you know you mentioned amos alonzo stagg you know being hired at a at a professor's salary back in you know eighteen ninety one you know it was controvercial at the time one of my favorite stories is the university of texas hired dana bible away from nebraska around nineteen thirty six thirty seven and in order to do so had to offer him a salary that was more than the president of the university.
Made and this was against state law so the texas state legislature increased the president's salary by you know a couple thousand or whatever to to match the seventeen five or whatever the dana bible made but the the sort of the beginning seismic tremor that that rippled out as far as i know was when texas am signed a guy named jackie sherrill away from pittsburgh around nineteen eighty two eighty three at roughly double the the going rate for a top coach bo schembechler at the time for example.
Of michigan was making a hundred fifty thousand dollars and texas am signed jackie sherrill for close to three hundred thousand dollars um and 00223.700,00228.950 what happens as soon as that happens is everybody else that's competing at that level has to start you know bumping their salaries to match them once the head coach is making that much then you have all the assistants underneath and also you've got an athletic director his goes up you know and actually the head of the ncaa you know so there's there's all these ripple effects that just increase the cost enormously.
So this was in the early to mid eighties the next sort of landmark case was florida state in nineteen ninety five giving bobby bowden the first milliondollar coach and i can't tell you how much greater that was from from the going rate but it was a considerable jump at the time just within two years florida you know the bitter rival of florida state has to go florida state one better so they give steve spurrier the first two million dollars and so now these things have escalated up to the point where some coaches now.
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Key Peele Substitute Teacher
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